Sunday, December 02, 2007

huh?



In all the chaos of moving, I almost forgot I have a book coming out! And apparently it's on shelves a few days early.


I'm still settling into the new place. Absolutely love it, although I have to admit it's a bit spooky walking up to the front door in the dead of night.





I'll be signing copies of Garden of Darkness at my favorite bookstore --
where: Once Upon a Crime
when: Saturday, December 8, 1:00 - 3:00

Stop in and say hi if you're in the area! If you aren't in the area or can't make it, feel free to call Pat or Gary and order personalized, signed copies. They ship!


Wednesday, November 14, 2007

getting back to the garden

this was the year to unfuck my life, and i suddenly find myself moving into the third and final phase of that plan. we close on the new place today, and i'll be cleaning and moving until Thanksgiving. i won't have internet until the last week of november, but i'll probably run to a nearby town once or twice to check my gmail and peek in here. (i lost a lot of mail and email addresses with my two computer swaps, so please use my gmail address. i dislike gmail, but i can now really see the benefit.)

i moved to the city almost eight years ago. i've always said living here is a little like being held underwater.

don't get me wrong. i love the twin cities and i always thought i would be able to adjust, but it never happened. I've spent years searching for solitude and quiet in order to write, but solitude and quiet doesn't exist here. This place is all about noise and energy.

I thought the condo would simplify my life, but instead it complicated it in a very water torture, mundane sort of way. By early July i was losing my mind and looking for a cabin in northern MN and WI. cold was no longer an issue -- escape was. i'd been looking for an old church or schoolhouse off and on for seven years, but i'd pretty much given up on that idea when i came upon the church listing.

a weird chain of events led to it -- the sale of my house -- which in this market i now realize was in itself amazing, the unsuitable condo situation, stumbling across the church listing completely by chance, a buyer's market, a seller/architect who had hoped an artist of some sort would live in the world he'd created, an absolutely amazing real estate agent i originally didn't want to work with because i was dead set against working with a guy, a mortgage broker who never gave up. So many people working so hard to make something happen. I also think the trip to Sweden reset my brain and got me off autopilot at just the right time.




As writers, I wonder if we sometimes have a harder time figuring out our own lives because we view the world through so many eyes. We know what our characters want, but we don't always know what we want.

We live so many lives that aren't our own, and maybe we live our lives less fully because of that.


so will this final phase unfuck my life? maybe. maybe not.



Saturday, November 10, 2007

on display with nothin' to say



blogging:

The thing that's been really frustrating is that I can't talk about what I want to talk about. Shortly after starting this blog, I found my locked lips so frustrating that I started another semi-anonymous blog where I vented and talked about my personal experiences in publishing. A fellow writer ended up reporting me and the blog...to somebody. After that experience, I pulled the plug on my "secret" blog, but wow -- I would have had some interesting and unbelievable stuff to post there.

Almost every day I think of something I want to blog about, and almost every day I think I'd better not say that. Even topics that on the surface seem fairly harmless. So anyway, rather than go on and on about me and my boring life, I'm going to close my blog at the end of this year. It might not be a permanent close. I'm going to wait and see if I feel like opening it again in the spring or summer.

Friday, November 09, 2007

defining a generation

for some it's the Beatles.
for some it's Dylan.
for me it's always been Neil Young.

I love so many bands and so many different kinds of music, but if I had to choose one band or one musician, it would be Neil Young. I've had obsessions with bands that will last a few years, then I tend to put the music away and remember it as a certain period of my life. The Pixies period. The Joy Division period. The Velvet Underground period. The Belle and Sebastian period. But Neil Young was never an artist I put away to bring out occasionally. Been listening to him ever since Buffalo Springfield.

Last night as we filed into Northrup Auditorium, I kept looking at the ticket in my hand. Never thought I'd hold one with his name on it.

He was amazing. His voice sounds like it did forty years ago. He started out with an acoustic set. He was the only one on stage, and would move from instrument to instrument. Then came the electric set and he pretty much blew the place away.



11-08-2007, Northrop Auditorium, Minneapolis, Minnesota
w/ Rick Rosas, Ben Keith, Ralph Molina, Anthony Crawford & Pegi Young

1. From Hank To Hendrix
2. Ambulance Blues
3. Sad Movies
4. A Man Needs A Maid
5. No One Seems To Know
6. Harvest
7. After The Gold Rush
8. Mellow My Mind
9. Love Art Blues
10. Love Is A Rose
11. Heart Of Gold
---
12. The Loner
13. Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere
14. Dirty Old Man
15. Spirit Road
16. Bad Fog Of Loneliness
17. Winterlong
18. Oh, Lonesome Me
19. The Believer
20. No Hidden Path
---
21. Cinnamon Girl
22. Like A Hurricane

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Restless Dawn

Jason is holding another short fiction contest!

The Clarity of Night




Tuesday, November 06, 2007

RIP MacBook

no, i haven't reposted an old entry. my NEW MacBook started acting sluggish, then quit working after five days. wouldn't recognize the hard drive. i took it to apple and they got it going again. thought maybe things had just come loose during shipping. it started the sluggish thing again a few days ago, then yesterday when i tried to restart, it once again showed no hard drive. this time they gave me a new computer, but acted suspicious and said they'd never seen this problem before. i know the first generation macbooks had a lot of problems, which is why i put off getting one as long as possible. anybody else have a similar macbook experience?

Sunday, November 04, 2007

of mice and men

i'm in the process of packing and i will be moving in two weeks. yay!! i can't wait!! there were so many obstacles to buying the church, but one by one they were resolved and everything is in order and set to close.

the mouse situation here is still unbelievable. i've never experienced anything like it, and i've lived in some dumps. even though it's cold, i have windows open and window fans going around the clock, and still the smell of dead mice is overpowering and makes me dizzy. i was told to put out poison, and i go through one small box a day. i've thought of reporting it to the health department, but i hate to do that because i think the condo owner will get in trouble when it is really the fault of the association. they do absolutely nothing about anything. nothing. after six months, my phone number still hasn't been entered in the box at the front door. but every time I run into the guy who's supposed to do it, he says he'll do it in a few days. haha! it's really a shame, because this is such a cool, beautiful building, but a condo is only as good as the association.


i'm a really negative person, and i know i always look for the negative in every situation, but this mouse thing -- it's bad.


oh, and just having a cat in the house will not keep them away. my poor old cat is scared of them. :D he went to his scratching post and a mouse eeked and jumped out at him. the cat scrambled and has been paranoid and nervous ever since.

but all things considered, i'm glad i tried living here because for years i've wondered if it wouldn't be easier to live in a condo or apartment where somebody else takes care of things. foolish me.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Garden of Darkness prologue

Happy Halloween!
This seemed a good day to post a little snippet from Garden of Darkness. The odd thing about this prologue is that it was page 200 in the first draft. While working on the second draft, I decided to move it to the very beginning.








GARDEN OF DARKNESS

Prologue

Where does the wind begin?

A dank breeze rose from the ground like one long exhaled breath. It lifted fallen leaves and swirled them up into the night sky. The leaves moved as if they knew where they were going, as if they had a destination. They flew past open windows where children were tucked in bed, hushed words snatched from sweet mouths and replaced with new ones.

“Where does the wind begin?” one child asked another.

“The Tuonela River,” the other child replied.

“What’s going on up there?” a mother called from below.

The children looked at each other in fear. “Nothing.” But they felt strange. Had a soft hand caressed them? Just a brush down the cheek, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind?

Sweet, sweet babies.

He drew nearer and inhaled their soap scent, and his breath stirred the fine hair on their heads.

Time was different here.

He could smell the river: wet driftwood, shells and bones gleaming on the shore. In the black mud of the river bottom, giant catfish slept the deep sleep in filtered light that was bent and reshaped. Never surfacing, the catfish waited patiently for prey to come close enough to catch and swallow whole.

Sweet, sweet life.

The damp night wind was tinged with sorrow and loss and longing.

Oh, to be complete, to be whole.

Some people said he was bad. But that was like saying a bear was bad when it caught a fish. It was like saying a cat was bad when it ate a bird. It was all about survival and nature. The bear wasn’t bad. The cat wasn’t bad.

He wasn’t bad.

Two places called to him, the old and the new.

For a moment he was confused. In his mind the two places meshed and he couldn’t separate them. Time moved forward and backward and the passage of a hundred years seemed like hours. Time unfolded and turned in on itself and his loss became something that hadn’t yet happened, and the strength and power he’d once known could possibly be found again.

He left the children and soared from the house, up through the roof but not as far as the stars. He joined a flock of night birds as they moved out of town, shifting and changing, blocking the moonlight.

On the ground far below, a man walking his dog felt the curious movement of air. He looked up, his face a white oval. He seemed to shrug and dismiss the sudden heaviness. But when the dog whimpered, he turned and hurried home.

Something was coming. Something had been coming for a long time. Something big. Powerful. Something that would shake the residents of Tuonela.

He soared.

To the old place.

His home.

Over the house built from native stone. Over the bare, rolling hillside that met dark woodland. Through the trees, silent and secret.

A light in the night.

A lantern and the sound of a shovel striking rocky ground.

This must be what it was like to astral project. To find yourself watching yourself. Because the man below was him, but not him.

The dead – they were everywhere. He could see their faces in the bark of the trees and the patterns made by the twisting leaves. Like him, they were looking for bodies to inhabit. Unlike him, they would take any vessel. He wanted one and only one.
The man on the ground seemed unaware of the dead surrounding him. He remained focused on his digging, never looking up. His heart pounded from exertion; steam rose from his shoulders.

Go inside.

The coaxing command seemed to come from the faces in the bark and the faces in the leaves. Who were they?

Don’t you remember us?
Don’t you remember your followers?


One face in particular became more distinct, the voice seeming to separate from the singsong chant of the others.
The scent of sage and lavender invaded his head. And somehow he could feel the softness of her skin under his fingertips.

Come inside, Richard.

Richard. That’s who he was. Richard Manchester, the Pale Immortal. And this was his land -- the land of the dead.

Come inside.

The man below stabbed the shovel into the ground, then released it and straightened, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand.

The night birds were gone. They had done their duty by bringing him here, and now they were asleep in the trees, heads tucked beneath black wings.

Richard hovered above the man with the shovel. Foolish person. Digging for secrets on the ground when the secret is above you. When the secret is in you.



Garden of Darkness
a paperback original coming December 4
from Penguin and Onyx Books

Monday, October 29, 2007

sharpen your brains


CRIMESPACE SHORT STORY COMPETITION 2008!


Crimespace

.
.
.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

would you buy a book written by this person?

my interview is up at in for questioning, and i finally really, really get why people never believe it when i tell them i'm a writer. heh!!

angie did a fantastic job!!! i had so much fun. a little too much maybe, but that's okay!

Sunday, October 21, 2007

In for Questioning

don't forget to check out
In For Questioning






New interviews every Monday. I've even added the link to my google homepage so I can see when a new post goes up. It is all so fun and laid back, which means Angie was able to talk me into a phone interview. gulp. I think that goes up on the 29th. everyone else sounds so together and intelligent. this was my typical response: i dunno. giggle, giggle. i dunno. giggle giggle.

and when she asked for a photo, i happened to come across this:





yep, that's me. that's the kind of photo a person should never let anyone else see. but it's also entertaining and just weird as hell. we were playing around with shadows and intense stage lighting. apparently it revealed the weird old shadowman who lives inside me.


this was taken at the same time:

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

the beginning!!

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.us


my wonderful mortgage broker appealed the loan rejection, and my file was personally delivered to another group of decision makers. dave called this afternoon to tell me they signed off on it and everything is go again!!!!!!! i'm still trying to process the whole thing. it's like digging up a body after you've had the funeral. so now the last hurdle is the inspection, which will take place next week.

i'm still in shock.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

the end




well, i didn't get the place. i was easily approved for the loan, but in the end the unusual property was considered too risky for lenders. i guess because GOD USED TO LIVE THERE. what a farce. took almost two months to reach this end. so apparently the only way to buy an unusual property right now is to pay cash.

yes, i'm pissed.

Friday, October 12, 2007

feeding the addiction

hello MacBook. It arrived yesterday and still needs most of the applications. love the weird, flat keyboard, and the screen is so crisp and clear compared to the iBook screen.

the signing went about like i'd expected. mall signings never go well, not even big group signings. i'm not sure why. maybe the lack of intimacy. small indy store signings usually do much better. i also think there's just too much going on at the mall of america. sensory overload. kind of like holding a signing in the middle of a midway. people don't want to slow down for something like that.

BIG HUG to the people who came and braved MOA on a saturday!! it was nice meeting you!! thanks so much for supporting local writers and the Minnesota Literacy Council!!


the house thing is still in limbo!! i'm discovering that the whole national mortgage mess has made it really hard to buy a home. i can get a loan, but making sure the place is worth what i'm paying has brought everything to a standstill. the appraisal is being questioned since there were no comps in the area. a third party has been brought in to find 3 local realtors who will come up with their own value figures. we've been waiting for them for a looonggg time, and are pretty much at their mercy right now. then it goes through underwriting again. another long wait. at that point they can ask for another appraisal or turn down the loan if they aren't satisfied. and this is all before the inspections, which could turn up something i don't want to deal with. so buying property ain't what it used to be. sometimes i think i should have given up, but i keep thinking each hurdle in the last one. the mortgage consultant, real estate agent, and seller have been amazing through this whole ordeal, which also makes it much easier to follow this through and see what happens.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

RIP iBook

my computer died on friday. i hope to be back soon!

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Booksigning and fundraiser


Midwest Fiction Writers and Barnes & Noble come together to raise money for The Minnesota Literacy Council.

Take advantage of this rare opportunity to meet so many local authors and purchase autographed books with a portion of the sales going to The Minnesota Literacy Council. Join us on Saturday, October 6 at 5:30 in the Macy's Court of the Mall of America for this once-a-year event. Hear authors read excerpts from their books. Visit favorite authors and discover new authors. Signing will be Midwest Fiction Writers authors Judy Baer, Helen Brenna, Kathleen Eagle, Anne Frasier, Jay Gilbertson, Lois Greiman, Tate Hallaway, Michele Hauf, Emma Holly, Patti O'Shea. Joining them in this event will be local authors Sujata Massey and Kelly McCullough as well as author and creativity coach Eric Maisel.

Date: October 6, 2007
Time: 5:30 pm - 7:30 pm
Place: Macy's Court, Mall of America

Saturday, September 29, 2007

far from the maddening crowd

or not~~



I thought I might have some news to share this weekend, but I don’t. All I can say is that I made an offer on a house in – of all places – rural Wisconsin. (No, not Tuonela! Drat!) My offer was accepted, but the inspection won’t take place until October 8 – so everything is up in the air right now, and there is no sense in saying much else about it until it happens. I can say it is a place with some really big negatives and some really big positives, so that’s very strange. It’s a space that’s not extremely livable at the moment, so it will be a project. And I know everybody will wonder what happened with moving south. Well, I’d love to live there in the winter, but not sure I’d want to do it year round. And it was just too hard and time consuming to find a place down there from up here. And once I moved into this condo, I realized the most important thing was to simply get out of town and away from people, at least for right now. I moved to the city over seven years ago, and I’ve always had a harder time writing here. Never could get used to all the distractions. So anyway, if this thing goes through I’ll post a few pics and tell everybody about it!

Sunday, September 16, 2007

it's not you

My trip to Sweden made me realize just how much the computer was contributing to my chronic neck pain. The only time I experienced any significant pain during the entire trip was at the Stockholm airport (return flight) when I got online to check my email.

I’m addicted to the internet, so now that I’m back home I’m making a conscious effort to stay away. I’m not reading blogs – not because I don’t want to read blogs, but because I’m forcing myself to stop. But it’s hard. I’m also trying to stay away from forums for the same health reason. Sorry, Daniel! I thought about shutting down my blog completely, but I’m going to try posting once a week – I’m thinking Sundays – and see how that goes. But anyway, just wanted people to know I haven’t been sucked into a black hole and I’m not depressed and I’m not pissed off and I miss you.

WRITING STUFF

Getting some reader/reviewer feedback on Garden of Darkness. Some of you might recall that I agonized over point of view in that book, finally deciding to take the riskier path and write one new character in first person – something that was quite possibly a self-indulgent experiment. So far one reviewer (Word Nerd) didn’t care for it, and I think it impacted her enjoyment of the book. Another reviewer (Armchair Interviews) loved it, and it enhanced her read. I’m guessing it might alienate quite a few people, so it probably wasn’t the thing to do. I should have written all characters in third person. On the other hand, I think this very kind of thinking is what is contributing to the sameness of books – so it’s a tough call. I hope to have a better handle on it as more reviews come in.

Sunday, September 09, 2007

In For Questioning -- the podcast

In the first weekly podcast at In For Questioning, Angie Johnson-Schmit interviews Daniel Hatadi, founder of Crimespace. Let the cool fun begin!




In For Questioning

Daniel Hatadi

Crimespace

Friday, September 07, 2007

Sweden









photo descriptions:
view from the poop cabin
forest in borlange with our friend sofia and her dogs
stockholm -- where I actually saw the troll from my troll post!
some idiot tourist


Thanks for all the well wishes in the previous comment section! I’m home and wanted to give you a bit of info about our amazing trip.

We took off from Minneapolis at 7:00 pm and flew into morning to arrive in Reykjavík five hours later. Iceland is such a bizarre, barren moonscape and I have to go back. We caught another flight to Stockholm, then a two-hour train to Borlange to arrive early afternoon.

What initially struck me about Sweden:

The quiet

Even in town, even in the train station and the airport.
Quiet. So quiet I thought my ears were plugged.

We were met by friends Karin, Linda, and baby Elvira who frowned at us like an old man.

Then it was off to our cottage on the lake, which would later be affectionately called the poop cabin because the septic system wasn’t working.

Things I learned:

I knew about the red houses, but I didn’t realize that 99% of the homes are red. And 99% of Sweden is beautiful. Organic. They live in the landscape, with narrow, winding roads and secret dark forests and deep glass lakes that can turn black in a moment. Clouds that constantly move across the sky. Boulders covered with blankets of moss, and the repetition of white birch and red pine. Fika, fika, and lights in every window. Lots of vivid accent colors that are perfect there, but never look right when you bring them home.

Cute
Cozy

I loved it and miss it.

I didn’t have much trouble adjusting to the time difference. We lost a night of sleep on the way over, so I think that first crash helped me catch up. On the return, we didn’t lose a night of sleep and I’ve had a harder time adjusting. I’m eating breakfast at 3:00 am, and chips and salsa at 7:00 am. Which would be noon in Sweden.

i didn't take enough photos, but i have a few up on flickr:



Sweden photos

cost of our adventure: even though the dollar isn't worth anything right now, the total cost for the trip was a little over 1K. My daughter and I split everything down the middle, we borrowed a friend's car, plus got a partial refund on the poop cabin.